Fluttering Thoughts of the Day

I'm at 17 weeks today. Seems like a long time since I started wearing maternity clothes, but I comfort myself with the thought that in another 6 weeks or so I can start wearing the more summery stuff, which will be all new to me. Ah, the frivolous things that consume our thoughts! *grin*

We got hit with the stomach flu last week; Trev, the lucky fellow, got it first, recovered, then got it again from me. He had to work Saturday to make up for the days he spent at home feeling miserable. Now he and I are both fighting off head colds. Hello, spring! The weather's all over the place here, one day it's +11 and the next there's a winter storm warning out. Part of the reason there's so many colds and flus wandering about, I think.

We're chipping away at the little things, despite it all. We went through our books, and gave away three book boxes full to the Calgary Symphony Orchestra's annual book sale. I adore books, and giving them away feels a little akin to donating my children, but I tried hard to be ruthless this time. We still have over two 6' bookshelves full, so we're not book-poor by any means. There's still a few things to organize in the basement, and a few odds and ends still to sell or give away in the garage, but we're definitely getting there.

I'm now only two pages away from finishing the sixteen pages that will finish my last half-done photo album. This will bring me up to the end of 2006; progress, but still a long way to go. I find it's going faster, though, now that I'm gaining expertise at using the scrapbooking program.

Otherwise, I'm trying hard to get reengaged with normal life again. I'm finding it difficult after living in survival mode for several months, to get back into menu planning and budgeting and all of that. I find it hard to care about those things after letting them slide, but I know it's important that I do. I'm also finding it hard to get into things with the kids, make the days interesting for them. They've been so good about amusing themselves that it feels much easier to let them keep doing it...but I'm missing out on the chance to connect with them, to encourage them and teach them and do all of the good things that I'm a stay at home mom for! So I'm trying to make the choice, whenever I see it, to get involved.

Life progresses, slowly but steadily, and I hope to make good use of the days.

Getting Back to Good

I've really started feeling more like myself the last few days, which has done wonders for my attitude. I vacuumed both upstairs and down on Monday, which I'd been putting off for weeks, and did many other sundry little things that had been niggling at me. There's also all kinds of little updates I haven't gotten around to, so......

I'm loving the digital scrapbooking, although I do miss the hands on, paper matching part of doing it the old way. I've finished Connor's baby album already, and am slowly catching up on our and Adara's albums. My last completed page in those was from June 2006, so I do have a ways to go! Still, I'm determined to finish catching up before the baby comes (Lord willing) so that when the exhausted post-baby haze clears away, I only have months of photos to organize, not years worth.

I'm starting to slowly establish relationships with a few of the homeschooling moms I've met. We've got a regular playdate set up now on Tuesday mornings, and we're working at setting up a monthly coffee night for homeschooling moms of preschoolers in the NW of Calgary. I'm excited to think that Adara will have some friends who aren't so busy with preschool and two to four extracurricular activities that they'll actually have time to play together! I've met way too many kids through Adara's ballet and gymnastics classes that are already in that boat...at three. Skiing, skating, dancing, swimming, art, music - you name it, they're in it. I find it a little overwhelming, to be honest, and I do occasionally feel like I must be depriving Adara by keeping her to two activities maximum a season. But then I try to picture life down the road with three kids (or more), and them ALL in a bunch of activities, and I chuckle and relax again. If we wanted to live like that, we wouldn't be homeschooling in the first place.

We're still not sure if we're going to stick with the church we've been attending. It's a nice church, and there are some lovely people there, but everyone seems so...busy. It's hard to connect beyond a friendly hello. We'll give it some more time and see.

We're still not sure where the recent shifts in Suncor will take us. Trev still figures it's a 50/50 chance of heading up to Fort Mac within the year; he hopes to have more of an idea by the end of April. Frankly, I'm not too worried about it. Fort Mac was fine, we'll do all right if we move back. I'd just like to know, so I can think about which summer and fall activities to put the kids into. I guess in a way, I've gotten used to bouts of living in limbo; I don't like it, but it doesn't stress me out the way it used to.

I'd better go get some sleep; the little guy is coming down with a cold, and Adara wasn't quite herself today either. Even if the night goes well, there will likely be plenty of sick-type whininess tomorrow, and I'll need all the patience I can get.

A Sign of Spring

We got an email today with the info about what soccer team Adara (and Trev, since he'll be the assistant coach) will be on this season. Trev has a coaching clinic coming up in less than a month, and the season starts about 2 weeks after that. Makes me feel like spring is here already!

The only disappointment for Adara was that she's on the 'Lime' team - she was hoping for orange, as it's Trev's favourite colour. At first she was hoping for her favourite colour, pink, but I explained that as long as the teams had both girls and boys on them, pink was not going to be an option. *grin*

Random Notes

• It's almost ridiculous how good making homemade chicken stock makes me feel. There's something so satisfying about using the carcass and all of my bits and pieces of veggies that I would have otherwise likely thrown out.
• My tummy is finally showing enough that people can be relatively certain I'm pregnant and not overweight. I like getting to that stage. I like pregnancy from here on in right up till the stage where people give me nervous looks because they're worried I might give birth at any moment. That gives me the giggles, and I'm always tempted to act like I'm having contractions. *grin*
• I'm at 14 weeks, the point at which "typical nausea fades away". I wish.
• I'm getting better at doing whatever needs to be done in the moments that I feel well enough to do it...and giving myself a break when I'm just not up to it. Trev still says I'm apologizing way too much, though.
• I love that Adara reads books to Connor. I love that he sometimes takes books right to her instead of Trev or I. I love seeing them curled up together on the couch intently reading together. Too cute.
• I can't think of any more points.

Determinedly Half-Full

Bad news: still nauseous, still exhausted.

BUT....

Good news:

• Went to the doctor on Thursday for a prenatal, and got to hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time! For just under 13 weeks, I guess that's unusual, but it was lovely.
• We've cleared a whole bunch of unwanted stuff out of the garage this week. Last weekend, Trev made me up a detailed list, and I listed two items at a time on Freecycle until they were all gone. He has a separate list he's going to sell on Kijiji (online classified), but thankfully it's much smaller. Progress is being made!
• Haven't gained any weight for the pregnancy yet. May not seem like a big deal to some, but my biggest mistake with the first two was to gain weight early on, and I gained way too much overall both times. Mind you, it's not all my titanium-strength willpower, the nausea has a lot to do with it. Hard to gain a lot of weight when all you can stomach is soup or cereal most meals. *grin*
• We're in the process of trying out a very nice church. The folks there are friendly, and we're getting to know some families. We're going to one family's house for supper Wednesday, and we're hosting a "Just Dessert" evening on Friday for three other families. The latter is a church-wide thing organized by the church admin, we just figured it would be easier on the kids if we hosted rather than visited, plus I like to bake desserts.
• The kids are both loving the Sunday School areas that are for their age groups. If you'd told me Connor at 2 would be looking forward to saying goodbye and going to play, I would never have believed you. There's awesome security, and they've even got separate rooms for 2s, 3s and 4s. Lots of littles, and a great adult/child ratio. Very cool.

That's all the positives I can think of for now. There's a lot though!

But anyway, what you see above is a pretty literal demonstration of what my brain does every time a little voice in my head complains. Another literal voice always pipes up with "BUT..." unless I'm in a serious blue funk, or so sick I don't have the energy to argue with myself. (That sounds funny). It's one of the things I really like about how my brain works.

What a week

Tuesday AM: host first playgroup, total of five moms and 9 children. Busy, but fun. Very draining for an introvert like me.
Tuesday PM: Mom calls to report she has fallen on the ice and broken her wrist. Pack up children and take Mom to hospital. Entertain kids in emergency room for several hours. Take kids home after doctors report it will be "a very, very long wait". Mom gets picked up 10 hours later.

Wednesday AM: annual children's photo at Walmart. First indications that Connor is getting quite sick, running high fever. Got one good pic, took sicky home.
Wednesday PM: help Mom maneuver around her house sans right hand (poor Mom). Connor's fever progresses to the point he cannot be put down without wailing. First indications that Adara and I are getting sick.

Thursday AM: wake up with bad cold. Con's fever has broken overnight, he's sick but manageable. Adara's cold-induced fussiness leads to several meltdowns, the most memorable being a 90 minute doozie because I nix the idea of pink and green tights with a red and navy striped dress. Take Mom to Costco to buy frozen food she can prepare one-handed.
Thursday PM: Cough a lot. Wish often I could take medicine. Visit Mom's with kids to help unpack purchased frozen foods. Contemplate weekend plans of visiting dear friends in Red Deer and having Trev's Dad stop by to visit on Tuesday. Feel overwhelmed. Go to bed as soon as possible.

Oy.

Join the Resistance!

I never could resist a good Star Wars parody, and this one even has me feeling like I'm joining in a noble effort! *grin*